|
|
Post by kaila on Mar 30, 2008 10:27:23 GMT -5
Hey everyone
I'm almost 18 and...
I've been suffering from some form of depression since i was 10,
I have always self harmed but never cutting myself
I've pulled my hair out so much that i had bald patches (btw i have really long thick hair)
I've chewed my nails right down
I have recently gotten over the depression stage but i can't get rid of a few nasty habits
picking, pullling, digging, squeezing and mutilating anything bump like or tense trying to get it to "pop" or release the white stuff.
I love it when it makes a noise or when you can feel the white stuff resisting.
sometimes i get a white lump that develops under the skin i then grab tweezers and dig through the layers in my skin to get it out. it often takes many attempts.
I pick at my arms, my face, my back, my chest, my collar bone area, the insides of my thighs,the skin around my pubic area and my calfs.
I have little white scars all over my arms
it is repulsing!
I have never been in a relationship even though the oppertunity has arose quite a few times.
I'm just to embarrased about the red bloody scabs and scars everywhere
I'm trying to hard to stop but nothing works
it's nice to know i'm not the only one who does this
|
|
|
|
Post by imapicker on Apr 12, 2008 19:43:41 GMT -5
I posted not to long ago. I was feeling pretty hopeful and not picking much but I hit, what I think is, rock bottom. I know writing about this makes me feel better but it also frustrates me b/c there is no real help. I can not stand posts like the one about sunflower seeds. I appreciate the suggestion but pickers want emotional satisfaction and a temporary high from squeezing any kind of skin pore, bump, ingrown hair, zit, pimple or infected scab that will produce some kind of fluid like puss, the white soft stuff, the white hard stuff, blood or just ooze in general. The other night I picked everywhere, hard. Then I took a sleeping pill, that usually ends the temporary misery but I got so out of it and decided that I should cauterize my arm pick wounds with a match. I made a horrific mess. I haven't been to the doc but I plan to go. Good news, the preoccupation with self administering burn care has cut down on the picking :)
So, no I don't want sunflower seeds. I don't need to occupy my hands. I want to modify by behavior and never have the urge to pick...
|
|
|
|
Post by Trance1861 on Apr 12, 2008 21:54:43 GMT -5
I started picking when I was 12 and I am 25 now. I have gotten much better.
To modify my behavior, I started introducing small "rules." I found it impossible to just quit cold turkey. I also found it hard to do what many do and cover every mirror in my house. While I am sure that modifies behavior, it is not practical since I need to look in the mirror to do my hair (and makeup). Anyway, so instead I introduced rules
The first rule I implemented when I was 16: No picking my face in the morning. The sores are a b**tc to cover up. This was easy to implement because I would wake up with just enough time to get ready to go to school, so there was no time to pick.
Second Rule: Started this when I was 17: Focus picking on certain areas of the face only, specifically those areas that heal faster and are easier to hide. For example, avoid picking center of the forhead, instead focus on the sides of the nose or my temples.
Third rule: Started this in college. The rule is "I will not use my skin as an excuse." If I pick and make a mess, I still have to go to work, dates, class. I have to face the fact that I have a problem and facing that fact includes having other people see me a mess. The embarassement from that drives me to get better. If I hide everytime there is a problem, then I will have no reason to stop picking.
Fourth rule: Started this one when I was 23. Avoid picking with my nails. I have 2 types of pimple extracting tools. Using them is better since I break less skin and don't get bacteria from my nails onto my face. I can still pick, and still get the same satisfaction from it, but it damages my face less.
So here I am, at age 25, and my skin is healing. I still have bad days where I break rules. But, overall, I have come a long way. It sucks that there is no easy answer. But, changing behavior is not easy.
I have also heard that a rubber band around the wrist is great at changing behavior. Everytime you go to pick, snap the rubber band. I don't know if this works.... and I am too chicken to try it. But it's an option.
Good luck!
|
|
|
|
Post by anotherskinpicker on Apr 22, 2009 21:46:51 GMT -5
Hi I'm 18 and I've been doing picking of some form since I was 12. When I was twelve I used to pluck hairs out of my legs and eyebrows, and if the skin was ingrown I would pick it to make it bleed. And if scabs were created I would continuously take them off. Then I started at 14 picking at my nose and face, my dad and sister wold call me rudolf, because my nose would be completely red when I finished. Picking my face has been a part of my life for 4 years now. I always have a lot of cover up. Now, my least favorite thing that I do is pick at my cleavage and nipples. The little tiny pores on my cleavage and bumps on my nipples. Before it got worse, I felt comfortable taking my shirt off in front of men, if that is the light was off. Now, I can't and will not do it. I know I'm young and I haven't experienced love before, but even a relationship is out of the question. I don't think there is a deeper psychological reasoning for picking my nipples-like trying to keep my innocence. I do want to be sexually intimate with men, but it's not an option. Breasts are supposed to be attractive. And if your cleavage and nipples are scarred up and have scabs..well then, I'm pretty sure they wouldn't accept me. I hate it I want to stop. I have spent so much money on repair lotion, scar healing creams. I have taken down the mirror in my room, and I confessed to my roomates my problem, so now we tape down the lightswitch in the bathroom so that I can't see my face well. I hate this. I want to stop. But at the same time I do get pleasure out of it. I've tried so many tactics. I'm really not that bad, I know a lot of people pick worse than I do, but it's a daily ritual... I read thing online and this man said "My own theory is that there may be some type of dysfunction of a brain mechanism that regulates levels of stimulation within the central nervous system, and that these behaviors represent an attempt to control these internal stimulation levels externally. People seem to pull, pick, or bite when thery are either overstimulated (dus to stress or excitement) or understimulated (due to boredom or inactivity). Many similar behaviors can be observed in animals who are kept in confined or unstimulating environments, or who live in stressful conditions. " I find this totally true, I believe it the most, from anything I've heard. Here's the site: westsuffolkpsych.homestead.com/SkinPicking.htmlBut I don't want to look to medicine to cure this. I want to stop myself!! I want to believe I have the power. It's been six fucking years!! I'm only 18, my body shouldn't look bad yet! I want to wait until I've popped out some kids and lived a little longer, and I think anyone can agree. Please e-mail me if you have any insight and to what I should do or what's worked for you. I love being able to have people to express this to! I don't feel so embarrassed. Thank you everyone! |
|
|
|
Post by Soccerchick on Jun 8, 2009 22:26:10 GMT -5
Hi All--
I used to come on this forum all the time because I could identify with every single feeling and struggle that people were going through and it gave me comfort. I am certain there is an underlying psych. disorder behind skin picking-- more research needs to be done.
I have been through psych meds, therapy, hiding mirrors, gloves, countless acne products, and make up to cover up the damage. But a few months ago I got serious about religiously taking vitamin B5 (pantothenic acid). It is my understanding that the vitamin acts much like accutane (one thing I've never tried) without all the dangerous side effects. Within a few days, I noticed that my face wasn't oily, and the pimples I did have were below the skin. I have been completely pimple free for 2 full months now. Early on, a pimple would form below the skin and I would try out extract something as I always do, and I couldn't! How frustrating at the time... yet the best thing I could have ever experienced. For once, I realized that leaving it alone and dealing with a bump below the surface looked 10x better than the hole I would have dug. And the less and less you can touch your face, the clearer it gets. I am still taking high doses of the B5 but plan to taper off soon. I feel like I could be a millionaire for discovering this secret (even though it was suggested to me). But I felt the need to share it with everyone on here. I'm sure you are sick of hearing success stories, but i know pantothenic acid is not widely advertised as an acne fighter. And it may help you as well...so do your research! I'd love to hear of anyone else who has tried taking the vitamin and seen results...
Best of luck!
|
|
|
|
Post by aaaaaaaaa on Jun 12, 2009 3:03:22 GMT -5
|
|
|
|
Post by Terry on Jun 15, 2009 16:36:19 GMT -5
Help!
I would have great skin if only I didn´t have this skin picking habit too...
My skin is perfect in the mornning when I get up, but then after a few hours of sitting at a desk I seem to start looking for scabs and spots on my fact to pick at. I want to have clean skin and I think it wouldn´t take long if I stopped taking my hands to my face, but whenever I´m sitting it´s hard not to do it.
It´s like eating a sugary doughnut without licking your lips. It only takes 2 minutes of concentrating on not doing it, but I´ve never yet managed it...
Any tips? I´ve only started reading about this today and realised that there are more people with this problem...I got over nail-biting as a kid, but I don´t seem to succeed at this..
T.
|
|
|
|
Post by Emma42 on Jan 29, 2010 20:36:00 GMT -5
I'm 22 next week, and I am an admitted face picker. I have a wonderful boyfriend of 1.5 years - he says he doesn't care about my acne problem, and I've told him about my secret. Honestly, you might feel insecure about the guy you are interested in knowing about your picking habit, but I guarantee you, if he is worth it he will not mind and will want to help.
Anyway, my problem is that I have lots of little bumps under the skin and a fair amount of blackheads. That facial sauna sounds amazing, I think I will look around for one of those. I'm currently taking a medical product called Benzaclin, which works sometimes, but my skin is never truly smooth so I just continue to make new problems for myself.
Being around friends and family, avoiding mirrors, these things help but I can always feel my face plugged up, even right now I just want to scratch off my face! I am a scientist and am under a lot of stress constantly, so maybe that has something to do with it. Keep the advice coming, please!
|
|
|
|
Post by IT HELPS on Feb 18, 2010 16:10:23 GMT -5
WEAR GLOVES. And wash your face with regular soap in the morning and then in the evening. After each wash put copious amount of face cream or chest rub. Get it at CVS or any other pharmaceutical store. Putting chest rub on face will make you feel burning sensation but it goes away, dries out pimples and you won¡¦t touch your face because there is cream there. So GLOVES, WASH, CREAM and don¡¦t look in the mirror. There is nothing there that you did not see already. If possible remove ALL the mirrors. For me it was not I live with family. IT ALL HELPED ME.
Wear thick gloves all the time for the first time. Remove when needed to wash hands or type back put right back. You will after a couple of weeks when you can wearing them less. Sleep with them, eat with them. DO NOT TAKE THEM OFF !!!! repeat do not take them of under any circumstances. If people start questioning , tell them that because your hands are too dry and they started cracking up your dermatalogies suggested to wear gloves to preserve moisture, only then he can prescribe hand cream. People buy that story ļ good luck
|
|
|
|
Post by amanda on Mar 4, 2010 19:31:06 GMT -5
I'm also 19 and have had an insane compulsion to pick my skin for about 5 years. I can 100% relate to your problems. I have no self-esteem problems, I'm constantly complimented on my looks, and aside from the normal stresses of a college student, I have no huge issues. I'm not addicted to anything. I just can't seem to stop picking the shit out of my skin. I don't even have an acne problem. If I wasn't obsessed with squeezing every single one of my pores, I would have flawless and beautiful skin. Now I'm constantly covered in scabs and scars, mostly on my arms and legs. I have a boyfriend whom i keep using lame excuses to lie to about my skin. I say that I have intense allergies and scars from scratching at hives. It's putting a strain on the relationship because I feel like I'm keeping this disgusting and sick secret from him, along with all of my friends and family. My mom's caught me picking and yelled at me. Once she asked if I needed help, but I was too ashamed to admit I had such a weird problem. I didn't want people to think I was insane.
I go into skin-picking trances almost everyday. Sometimes I lock myself in the bathroom and pick for hours. It's disgusting. I've even given myself bacterial skin infections, and picked at those. I think I'm ready to find help and admit that I have a problem.
|
|
i thought i was alone
Guest
|
Post by i thought i was alone on Jul 15, 2010 1:16:15 GMT -5
I can't believe i am not the only one, and how similar each of our stories are is quite remarkable, in that there are definitely psychological factors that play a part in picking...i was diagnosed with bipolar disorder, OCD, anxiety and panic disorder when i was 15...i cut myself, hated myself, hurt myself, blah blah blah, i have a timeline stories like all do, i have grown, lived, experienced time to get out of if all and discovered that the body and mind are a ying yang, and without a healthy body, the mind simply cannot be healthy. I stopped smoking two packs of cigarettes a day, changed my diet from candy, powdered sugar and lemonade powder to actual meals, and i leave the house...my mind followed. I believe i self-induced all this psychological shit onto myself. because i am not bipolar unless i send myself into that state by not living well. I considered myself a worthless person, therefore did not treat my body as worthwhile, the strange catch 22 cycle of it all, once i started to treat my body as worthwhile, my mind began to feel different...alive and stable.
i am at a much different place now at age 21...excited to live, but my picking is a habit that just will not leave me!!! i never connected it to anything else before. i told people i had chestne, acne on my chest, but i would see what was under my skin and go searching to dig it out...my nipples are what got me here to this forum...i am so sick of my habit because of what it has done to my nipples. i am determined to have ones that i dont hide...now that i am single for the first time ever!!!! hehehe. so, they are destroyed, scabbed, and swollen at all times. any chance i get, alone in a room by a well lit window, my shirt gets pulled down and i am at it!!!! i have learned to refrain from my chest as much as possible, i realized that when you really do just stop picking, the stuff to pick really does get better...but there is something about my nipples that i can't stop picking!!!! if i am nervous, out comes my breast! if im alone, here comes my nipples...its like my hands just go there, and once i start, my head screams, "Just Stop!!!" but my fingers are addicted...and then yea, i don't stop...cuz my fingers are controlled my head, which really gets an absolute thrill in what i can get out of my nipple.
I dont want ugly swollen scabby bloody nipples anymore. i know i am an anxious person, and i know now from this forum that these things are all connected...anxiety, nerves, the mind. I really do think it stemmed from my earlier issues, but now that i feel healthy, i think it just might be a habit from that all.
I want a magic cream that makes my nipples beautiful so i dont want to hurt them anymore. cuz i guess they are all pussy ugly gross nasty that i keep thinking, well, they are gonna be there all gross to pick at so you might as well...
wow, thanks forum, what wonderful therapy to have written all that out!
|
|
|
|
Post by pxi79 on Aug 9, 2010 18:40:08 GMT -5
I just made a website about picking: jghafer.glogster.com/groomingdisorders/and it has a lot of info about what I did to stop! i need feedback though, I'd love any comments. and good luck with stopping!!! |
|
|
|
Post by Damalia on Jan 4, 2011 21:46:42 GMT -5
|
|
|
|
Post by Monica on Jan 17, 2011 18:09:34 GMT -5
I'm 15 and I've been picking as long as I can remember. I can remember as one of my first memories my babysitter yelling at me for picking my lips intill they bled. My mom and sevral of my aunts picks their cuticals.
When I got older I swiched to my arms. I have dozens of little white circles all over my arms and hands. This later led to more serious forms of self harm. Once I stoped cutting (about 9 months ago) the problem seemed to decrease, but now I'm back picking all the zits on my face.
I stoped picking my lips by always wearing a slimey lipgloss which makes them pretty and shiney but rather gross to touch.
|
|
|
|
Post by kjennifer on Jan 18, 2011 19:21:05 GMT -5
I've been a skin picker for years ( I'm 22) but I've learned to control it ... I usually try to avoid mirrors & getting close up ... most of my picking was all on my forehead .. so I decided to get bangs ! this helped distract me from my imperfections & when I do go on a picking binge , I am wayyy gentler then I used to be , I NEVER break the skin ... I've got a few scars that are only noticeable to me thank god... I'm fortunate that my skin was so forgiving ... I try to talk myself out of it ... I used to feel SOB crazy ... once I picked I wouldn't go out in public for days which eventually got me depressed ... I definitely know stress is my trigger ... & when I'm ALONE ! from my experience face washes & cremes make things worse ... I do like proactive , just because it put me on a routine , which is extremely important for skin pickers . you can't just put all kinds of products on your face & expect not to react !! Anyways , it gets better with time ... realize that YOUR the one damaging your skin by picking at things that are SUPPOSED to be there !! so back away from the mirror !!! seriously I did my research , YOU have to get yourself through it there is not miracle cure BUT there is hope for you    need any help or advice you can always email me ... that1gurl414@aol.com |
|
need any help or advice you can always email me ... that1gurl414@aol.com