Out of control picking!!!!

[Serendipity]

five years ago I looked online for info about skin-picking..couldn't find it...just got done with an "episode" (it's 2 a.m.) and in desperation thought I'd try again...now there's tons of stuff about it!!!! YAY! For the FIRST time in all my long 20 yrs. of picking at my acne EVERY DAY and feeling depressed afterwards and embarrased to go out in public...I HAVE HOPE!!! (And something to show my husband to prove to him I DO struggle with this thing and can't just "stop". Even though I haven't found many answers yet..it's so nice to know I'm not the only one like I thought.

[jn2]

I have a 9 year old daughter that has been picking at her face, arma, and legs for about a year now since she stopped sucking her thumb. Any helpful advice? She feels like she can't stop herself. I am just trying to find some way to help her.

[didntknow]

i came across this site by doing a project on ocd for a psych class and my curiosity of diff links led me to the page about skin picking. i never even realized it was a problem. i felt like it was just a habbit i did when i was bored or while i was taking a test. i notice i do this when im nervous or bored but i didnt know it was such a problem. i have acne that isnt too severe but i can say is mostly genetics given that both parents had it severe. it doersnt help that i pick at my face sometimes to enhance my appearance, or scratch at my scalp if i feel like its dry, but makeup really covers it up. i get more shy in diff types of lighting bc it might enhance the scars or skin. i feel more comfortable in darker areas bc people cant really see everysqare inch of my skin. sometimes i feel like people know i have a probelem bc im always touching my skin and although i consider myself very attractive, mentally i make myself beleive that people are looking at nothing except my skin.

thankyou for the tips, im goign to try and stop the picking now that i know its such a prevelant problem.

[pr23]

Wow. I can't believe I found this forum either. I have been picking myself for as long as I can remember, like from age 7 or 8. I just turned 24 now. I thought I was the only one for so long! I just recently started to look online for solutions to stop. I do it all day, and I am finally coming to grips with myself. What is funny is that I have read a lot of posts here that there are attractive women who do it and no one knows. I am an attractive female, but I pick my scalp, hands, stomach, and the back of my waist. It's pretty tame now. It's like I fluctuate, sometimes its really bad and sometimes its not as bad. What I don't understand, is that my spots are almost exactly symmetrical. The same spots on both hands, on both sides on my stomach, same on my back and legs. I just recently noticed this. I have never had symmetrical scars, just random places, and when I noticed this, I got really scared. Somehow I am unconsciously doing this to the point of it getting to be the same on both sides, how could this be? I can't be in a relationship, either. If I am with a guy and he gets close to a spot, I guide his hand away. I am ready to change. I have researched that HRT (habit reversal training) therapy really works the best. I read this page that I really related to: www.homestead.com/westsuffolkpsych/SkinPicking.html I am not a fan of taking drugs because of the side effects. What a relief to read about others like me.

[Guess]

::)When I found this forum it made me break into tears. I am 21 years old, married with 2 children, and I've been picking my face, arms, chest, back, bikini line and legs for 8 years. It started in a bad year of junior high and has taken over nearly half of my life. I too am considered to be beautiful by those who have never seen the real me. I must think I don't deserve to be beautiful to do this to my skin, it is constant tug of war with my self. My husband and mother both think I am silly and could stop if I really tried. But I have tried, many times, and I really really can't stop. I do it to soothe myself, I do it when I am stressed, I do it when I feel guilty. Gosh who knows all the reasons why we do it? Is there anyone out there who has tried the Hypnosis and it really worked for them? Thanks. ::)

[Djohnson83Tigermailcom]

Hi, my name is Danielle Johnson, and I have been picking for almost 20 years now since I was 4 years old. No matter what I do, I can't stop myself. I try listening to music, watch some tv, take a walk on the beach. It doesn't work. Plus my skin is extremely sensitive, I can't even take a hot shower, cause then I get blotchy all over my body. I've picked my right arm, now there are scars. I've picked my chin and I am still picking it, even now that its grown white hair. I've stopped with my arms and legs, but now I'm doing my cheeks, ears, even my scalp. And I've been getting bald spots, my mother says now, I have about 6 spots. What should I do? My mother can no longer help me, she threatens me by admitting me to a mental hospital. And I'm not stupid. I want to stop, but I can't do it alone. What should I do?

[anonymousartist]

That's absolutely unnecessary of your mother to threaten you with a mental hospital unless you are doing serious harm to yourself. You are not alone in this at all. There are many many people who do this and hide it. Maybe you could google some information on compulsive skin picking or dermatillomania and print it out and give it to her to read so she will be informed. We all know what it's like to be told to stop and that we just can't.

It may be good for you to seek the help of a therapist (psychologist or psychiatrist) though. One who has a good reputation and feels comfortable for you to talk to. There are also a number of support groups online (this one is kinda dead sometimes, so I started one at skinpicking.proboards77.com/index.cgi which you (and anyone else) are welcome to join so that you can talk to others about this.

[henny]

umm i have been picking my skin for the such a long time. i literally had no idea that anyone else had this issue untill i googled "i pick my face" (embarrassing) and i found this site and a few others. it comes every so often. i will get into a mode that lasts usually about a week or two and i willl pick pick pick my pimples untill thers fresh open sores in every single little blemish, sometimes ones so little i make them bigger when i pick it. its gross and sick but some how i get a sick pleasure from seeing the stuff come out. idk. i really need help. its not just on my face. any cut or scab i have anywhere on my body.. when ever it dries i pick it again. its the same cycle: cut, dry, pick, dry, pick, dry pick, dry, pick. when does it end? i use neosporen sometimes but i just feel gross andgreesy b.c i basically have to put it all over my face,. UGH HELP

[TB]

I've been picking since I was a little child - scabs from falls originally, like skinned knees. I'm now 42 and the problem has been serious for long periods in my adulthood, but I've done better the last few years since I've started to investigate more about health and this particular behavior. One explanation I read on one of the more scientific sites said that people use picking to gain a sense of homeostasis - that's why at times we do it when bored (for stimulation), and at other times when stressed (to calm down or get relief from overstimulation). Now, I try to stop and think - "Right now, am I trying to stimulate or diminish over-stimulation?" Then I can address whichever state, but consciously.
It also helps that my husband knows about the problem and is supportive. He gave up nagging, cuz that definitively does NOT work, but when I ask him to support me at critical moments, he does - like if I call out from the bathroom mirror that I need his help to stop, he will, or if I ask him to hold my hands and caress them, he will. Sometimes, he's already asleep, and my caring about him and not wanting to wake him sometimes provides enough motivation to stop on my own.
The most unusual and effective remedy that stops me in the middle of a picking bout is my cat. When I pick for more than five minutes, she consistently comes into the bathroom and meows looking up at me. It may be a subjective observation on my part, but I feel like she's trying to rescue me, and because I want to encourage that support she provides, I tell her, "OK, OK, thank you. Just one second. Thank you." Then, out of respect for her, I stop, and talk with her and pet her, thanking her profusely. This reward encourages her to repeat her "rescue" behavior.
Another thing which is my primary approach is learning about digestion and supplements and applying what I learn, so that what manifests on my skin from the internal sphere is minimized, ie reducing inflammation, allergic responses, etc. Eating yams and greens and healthy fats helps me. A salad a day helps a lot! Getting enough rest and drinking enough water and getting regular exercise helps.
Finally, learning to cut myself a break and treat myself as I'd treat others (flip the golden rule, basically, for us folks who are very good at caring for others). Relax with my imperfections. Breathe deeply; hold my head high. These are small things, and they don't get rid of the problem entirely, but they definitely help. At least now I don't feel like a pariah. If I have to go out without make-up, it's not the end of the world. I can tell people frankly if they ask, "I'm working on a skin-picking problem."
I send this with love to all who are currently suffering with the isolation and pain of this malady,
T.

[Dee13]

TB you have learned so much, thanks for sharing and keep up all the good work. I need to get a cat and train it to help me. Dee

[hans hoffman]

i basically just realized that this compulsion i have is just one of my many symptoms-- never realized before that it could have something to do with the panic disorder and constant nervousnes. does anyone
else have these other symptoms? and i always have to wash any area i have picked thoroughly before i can feel at ease-- anyone else?

mary

[Apple]

:'(I just got done from a picking episode & each time I do it, I feel guilty afterwards, promise myself I won't do that again, only to go back a couple of days later. Looking into the mirror sometimes can take 2 minutes or a couple of hours depending on whether or not I pick my face. So horrible knowing I spend so much time in the mirror scarring my skin up, only to go out & buy the best skin regiments which clears it up, only to go back & do the same thing again. It's a cycle.....a battle with your fingers; your body can't control the urge & once you pick JUST ONE, you can't seem to stop. I truly know what all of you are going through & I'm 22, have been doing this for the past 5 years & haven't been able to stop. I much appreciate this site, give me hope. Good luck ladies & gents.

[kell]

Hi there,

I also have a skin picking problem. I started when I was about 8, when I first started getting acne, and I'm now 26.

I pick at spots on my face, neck, back, chest, ears, legs, lip, shoulders and arms. I also scratch my scalp, pick at the skin at the side of my fingers, cuticles and the dry skin on my feet.

My problem has become worse over the last 5 years and I have never had a long term boyfriend because I am embarrassed of the way that my skin looks. I also have low self esteem and lack confidence.

I've identified times and places, where I pick the most and tried not to do it then. I've been doing well for 6 days, I've not stopped, but I've controlled myself most of the time. I pick when I am stressed, when I am day dreaming, when I am in an uncomfortable situation, when I feel an itch and when I don't realise I'm doing it.

After I've picked I feel really angry with myself, but I love the feeling when I've been successful at picking a ripe spot, where I'm able to remove the centre cleanly and inspect the evidence afterwards (sorry, not very pleasant, I know). When I get one of those I look for another, and before I know it I have bright red, blotchy, painful skin, all over my body.

During the day, my hands search my face, back and neck, looking for lumps. When I find one I can't stop thinking about it, touching it, until eventually give in and I pick at it. Then when I am in a picking frenzy, I go into a trance, and can be doing it for an hour maybe longer before I realise what I am doing and stop.

I did try to go to the doctor for help about one year ago, I explained my problem, and ask to see a counsellor. He just prescribed me some antibiotics for spots, which helped to decrease the number I have, but does not solve my problem. I have lost confidence to go back and seek help again. I have also tried to tell my friends before, but they don't see my problem as being serious, and have dismissed me.

It has been really helpful to read your messages and gives me a sense of belonging to know that there are other people with the same problem and that I am not suffering alone. Hearing stories of people that are recovering or have recovered gives me hope.

My main way of avoiding picking has been not to look in the mirror and to spend more time around others, as I pick more when I am on my own. I've tried keeping my nails short, and I'm recording in a diary each day that I am successful.

At the moment, I am trying to keep my skin clean for an interview for my professional qualification I have on 20th April, then a ball the next day (my dress is quite low at the back). It will be after that that, when I don't have a reason not to pick that I will relapse, as when I have something other than me to do it for I am far more successful. I don't want to be doing this for the rest of my life, but at the same time, something inside me does not want to stop.

I found this website, which you may already know about. I have found quite useful www.stoppickingonme.com/index.php and thought you might be interested too.

I hope that you all find the courage and the strength to quit, just don't give up hope.

Thanks for reading this

Kelly

[EAH]

Before I read this, I thought I was the only one that had a problem with piciking. This makes me feel a lot better knowing that I am not alone; it gives me the courage to overcome the nasty habit :-)

[mark25]

This forum has really really helped me. Just reading all the posts did it. I am probably the only male on here with picking issues. I am 25 and have been picking skin and pulling hair on and off for around 10 years. My mom who is in her 50's is a major picker as well (still!).

It is basically a way to control stress. I get immense satisfaction from picking and pulling hair, but then I feel really gross and unattractive because of it. I am not 100% pick free, but getting close. So here are my solutions: 1) read this whole forum. 2) Make yourself so busy that you don't have a spare minute. (this physically does not allow you to have time to pick) 3) Hide mirrors and "torture" instruments. I used tweezers to pick on my face until I found this forum in October and simply placed my tweezers in a different room far away from the bathroom. And it worked because by the time I go and get them, I realize that I shouldn't be doing this. 4) And really, will power helps, picture the skin that you want and think about how you can't get that because you are picking, and what is more important the pleasure of "cleaning" your pores or feeling normal, especially when you live in New York and everyone around is a model. 5) product-wise I am still experimenting with stuff for my face, using clay masks and shaving often helps. For my chest and shoulders, I found that the proactive repairing lotion works (but not for the face) 6) For the scalp picking, (yep, I do that too) it helps to brush hair with a fine comb, I imagine that the stimulation from the comb touching the scalp does it. Well good luck to everyone, and watch gattaca for an example of what can be achieved with will power alone.