Post by rabbitmoon on Sept 22, 2003 14:24:16 GMT -5
hello all! im back from my summer-long vacation - i have a couple new things to talk about. one is- i was wondering if anyone else does this- i have mostly stopped picking. my skin normally looks better than it has in 7 years.... but ive noticed a new trend- i seem to do really really well for weeks at a time and my skin heals up SOOOOOO nicely and then i just do it again. in one or two days my complexion is all messed up. then i immediately go back to not picking for weeks without a problem. its this endless cycle. ive noticed that my urge to pick is barely there most of the time these days but i notice myself feeling somewhat uncomfortable about having perfectly clear skin. its like i NEED to have a mark or two at least or it feels kinda funny. i wonder if its like some sort of sheild for me??? i dont know. im ready to break this cycle. i need a little help.
on the bright side, ive improved DRASTICALLY over the past 4 months. i havent looked this good in (like i said) 7 years and i want to tell you all a few things that really helped me---
when my skin looks really bad i NORMALLY would cover myself up as much as possible, hang my hair in my face, feel insecure, and constantly worry about which way i should not move my head or this and that so that people wont see too much damage. as a result, i just felt like shit most of the time and it actually made me worse, not to mention my posture and attitude and all that drew more attention to my bad qualities than good.
so now, if my skin looks bad- i dont let myself wallow in it- i put on whatever i love to wear- something that looks cool and i feel good in- i may even wear my hair up. i concentrate on realizing that my skin is not who i am - that im a LOT bigger than that and i just push myself to move forward, feel confident, and concern myself with only things that make me feel good.
this makes the hugest difference to me. it makes me stronger braver more confident and more able to quit.
its just a matter of making the decision to not let csp rule all areas of your life anymore.
i realize i make that sound a lot easier than it is for some people. beleive me it took me a very long time to work up to that. but i think you should give it a try. remember who you are, the beautiful, not the difficult.
i think what ive realized the most is that, as scary as it sounds, i really dont beleive most people are able to cure JUST their csp. i think it takes a total personal revolution- changes-healing old wounds-growing spiritually. because i think its all related. for me at least, its all or nothing. i had to change myself to change my habits. i mean, im not less myself but more...its just coming back to the beautiful soul that you really are- that maybe you have forgotten. ok. well. i hope that helps somebody. love, rabbitmoon.
on the bright side, ive improved DRASTICALLY over the past 4 months. i havent looked this good in (like i said) 7 years and i want to tell you all a few things that really helped me---
when my skin looks really bad i NORMALLY would cover myself up as much as possible, hang my hair in my face, feel insecure, and constantly worry about which way i should not move my head or this and that so that people wont see too much damage. as a result, i just felt like shit most of the time and it actually made me worse, not to mention my posture and attitude and all that drew more attention to my bad qualities than good.
so now, if my skin looks bad- i dont let myself wallow in it- i put on whatever i love to wear- something that looks cool and i feel good in- i may even wear my hair up. i concentrate on realizing that my skin is not who i am - that im a LOT bigger than that and i just push myself to move forward, feel confident, and concern myself with only things that make me feel good.
this makes the hugest difference to me. it makes me stronger braver more confident and more able to quit.
its just a matter of making the decision to not let csp rule all areas of your life anymore.
i realize i make that sound a lot easier than it is for some people. beleive me it took me a very long time to work up to that. but i think you should give it a try. remember who you are, the beautiful, not the difficult.
i think what ive realized the most is that, as scary as it sounds, i really dont beleive most people are able to cure JUST their csp. i think it takes a total personal revolution- changes-healing old wounds-growing spiritually. because i think its all related. for me at least, its all or nothing. i had to change myself to change my habits. i mean, im not less myself but more...its just coming back to the beautiful soul that you really are- that maybe you have forgotten. ok. well. i hope that helps somebody. love, rabbitmoon.