building tolerance to bumps

[stilltrying]

I'm pickfree on my arms, and pretty good elsewhere (I don't really pick other parts of my body in the same intensive, compulsive trance-like way I would go after anything bump like on my upper arms).

One of the biggest problems I have is that I hate having these bumps and I know just the quickest squeeze and it's out. I had the idea that I need to build tolerance to my skin having bumps. I am going to try looking at my arms (which just had a chemical peel and feel really smooth) under the bright nighttable light when I know my husband is right there. I have never been able to pick around other people so I know I won't.

Then I'll have looked, seen all these bumps, but not picked. The only thing that worries me is that once I see one I think about it all the time and I worry I won't catch a later trigger.

Do people thing this will help, or is just risky without a good payoff?

I know my husband has bumps in his skin and he doesn't care. I don't know if I can get back to that not caring or if I just have to be vigilant stopping myself for ever. I don't want this hanging over me though where if I see one I won't be able to stop myself. Here I'll have a good chance to work on repeating that they will go away anyway, picking will make my now-nice skin look terrible, etc.

Should I?

stilltrying

[Dramaqueen]

Stilltrying,
To be honest I dont think that is a good idea because even if your husband is there you will think about it and do it later when he isnt around. I know because I would do that too. Your arms are looking better so if I were you I would fight as hard as I could to not look at them under the light at all. Once you examine the bumps again the urge will not go away and you will be angry with yourself later. It is a cycle and for people like us there is no "just looking" at the bumps without a pick session following. Does your husband know you pick? If he does then maybe you can ask him to help you not to pick at them by reminding you how you feel after. If he doesnt know then I would tell him. You would be amazed how talking about the problem can help you start the healing process. You could also put a bandage on your arms to block you from picking if worse comes to worse. Dont cave into the temptation honey I promise you will be so proud of yourself if you resist. Good luck you are doing great. Stay strong.

[stilltrying]

I think you are right. I'm certainly catching myself trying to look al the time. My mantra is 'I don't do that any more'. It seems to be working. I sure say it a lot (even more now that it's sunny where I live) and each time I do it reinforces the point. Just last night I swung by the bedside lamp and almost turned it on before telling myself a couple of times that I don't do it anymore.

You really are right. Looking would have been totally overpowering at this point. I still know they are there ... it's creepy but manageable as long as I don't have a specific bump to start wanting to pick. I managed to leave the one alone on my inner elbow and it's mostly gone. When I do look at it, I remind myself that I can barely see it. I didn't pick it and it is going away and it looks good. It helps a lot to repeat myself. :-)

stillytrying