···»Fíghtîng Ît Èvë®y Dåy«···'s Journal

[···»Fíghtîng Ît Èvë®y Dåy«···]

Unless I screwed up and skipped some marbles, tonight marks my 8th one on the jar. ;D I'm feeling great. I'm healing up really well -- very flaky but that's to be expected. Every day gets a little easier. I really believe this is it for me. I think I finally got past the issues that I needed to work through. Doing well, staying strong... Will update again soon.

[glow=pink,2,300]today gets: 5 out of 5 stars (i rock!!!)[/glow]

[Heather]

Good Job, Fighting it.

Just don't forget to take it one day at a time

[···»Fíghtîng Ît Èvë®y Dåy«···]

I'm sorry I haven't posted in the last um... ten days -- geez it feels so much longer than that!!! Well anyway I'm pleased to say that I have not picked at all since I last posted. I'll bet you weren't expecting to hear that! I still have my gorgeous acrylic nails -- in fact I'm overdue for a fill so I'll be going in for that within the next few days -- and I'm doing great. The urge is just gone. I'm also not biting my nails anymore, needless to say. I forgot about the marbles and I pretty much forgot about posting here too, but I still managed not to pick. I think that says a lot. I really feel like something is different this time. I remember hearing Oprah say that you can't lose weight until you're just "ready," and that you would know when you were "ready." Well, I'm apparently not there yet when it comes to weight, but when it comes to picking, I'm there! Wow, that feels so good to say. I actually feel bad to say it here because I feel like we're supposed to be commiserating together, and for once I'm not picking anymore... I hope that I can be an inspiration to somebody out there, even though it's only been 21 days... 21 days!!! Oh my gosh, I have heard it said so many times, that it takes 21 days to make or break a habit. Wow... I did it. None of this means I'll never pick again, of course. I'm human and I'm sure I'll fuck up somewhere along the line. But I'll always remember that I was finally able to stop for a full 21 days and I can always do it again. Yay me. I'm a happy girl tonight. Let's say that no news is good news -- if you don't hear from me for a while, it most likely means I'm still doing good. If I mess up, I'll be back here for sure. Wish me luck... I wish all of you all the luck and the strength in the world...

[Heather]

Fighting it,

That is AWESOME. I am thrilled to hear you are doing well. Just remember though, it only takes one slip to throw everything off kilter. I hope that doesn't sound discouraging...what im trying to say is...keep aware, and keep taking it one day at a time.

You're progressing beautifully.

Love,
Heather

[···»Fíghtîng Ît Èvë®y Dåy«···]

Thanks Heather, believe me, I totally get what you're saying. And I do mean totally. I think we all do. I know that by reaching 21 days of being pick-free I have not suddenly become immune to the urge to pick. I haven't had it in a long time, but I know that in times of stress it will return. I'm ready to fight it though. I refuse to let it control me any longer. I have a life to live, and I have to get on with it. For the record, I'm still not picking and I'm doing really great. Just got my nails done again today, in fact, a little bit shorter so I can type better -- I'm applying for a new job tomorrow! Yay! Go me, go me... A very big thank you to everyone here for being so supportive. I'll give myself a rating for old times sake:

[glow=pink,2,300]today gets: 5 out of 5 stars ;D[/glow]

[Canuck]

3 cheers for Fighting It!

Keep your nose to the grindstone, girl. With a little bit of hard work, another 21 days will pass before you know it!

Here's to many more 5 out of 5 days.

[Secret]

Beautiful!! You're an inspiration.

[···»Fíghtîng Ît Èvë®y Dåy«···]

Thank you so much Canuck and Secret! I have read your messages too and believe me, you are also an inspiration to me. All of you here are, just for being here and trying to change your lives. I'm right there with you.

Today is January 29th and I still haven't picked! It feels great. It's weird to not have that urge. I almost feel like I cheated the system somehow. I did this for nearly ten years and suddenly I can just stop? It's odd to me. Not that I'm looking the gift horse in the mouth (whatever the hell that means, LOL!!) but it's just really hard to understand why THIS time was the RIGHT time, you know? What changed within me? Why was I finally able to get through it? I don't know...

February 1st will be my one month anniversary of no-picking. What should I do to celebrate?

[Canuck]

···»Fíghtîng said:

February 1st will be my one month anniversary of no-picking. What should I do to celebrate?

What shouldn't you do?!!!

Congratulations to you, Fighting It! Do not question why this time was the right time, celebrate that the time finally came and you took full advantage of it! I'm so proud of you!

[···»Fíghtîng Ît Èvë®y Dåy«···]

Still doing good, just wanted to let all of you know. Hope you're hanging in there too.

[Heather]

Thanks for the update, Fighting It! Keep vigilant every day.
Love,
H