kay
New Member
Posts: 13
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Post by kay on Jul 23, 2005 14:12:32 GMT -5
I'm stuck in the cycle... again. Do you ever feel desperatly lonely because of the need to isolate yourself after your picking attacks? My face was looking semi-better and I was feeling a little more social, then I lost it last night. Now I have a face that can only be described as a mess. My boyfriend wants to go out and do something fun tonight, for the first time in a long time, and I really don't think I can face the world like this. I'm perpetuating the feeling of isolation and desperation, but I don't know how to stop it. I know if I go out of the house, I will be miserable and worried constantly about what people are thinking about my war zone of a face... do you know what I mean?
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Post by 2005astro on Jul 23, 2005 21:02:01 GMT -5
i think that's one of the main subconscious impulses that fuel picking-- a self-destructive need to isolate ourselves because of some deep-seated insecurity or lack of confidence. right now i'm sitting at home while all of new york has an amazing summer evening. i can't even face my roomates. today i thought i felt pretty good, no attention paid to pores or skin problems . just a plan to tan on the roof for awhile, then attend a bbq with good friends. as gorgeous sunlight streamed through my window, i took my contacts out and started taking off my eyemakeup, then all hell broke loose and i remember resolving to squeeze every pore on my face! i worked at it for like two or three hours and now am hopeless and lonely in the dark!
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kay
New Member
Posts: 13
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Post by kay on Jul 23, 2005 22:33:28 GMT -5
Thank you for responding. I'm in Vancouver... far away geographically, but exactly the same in headspace. You hit the nail on the head with your first sentence; so many times I have wondered if subconciously I sabbatoge myself when things start to improve, forcing myself to stay in the dark, planning how many days I have to wait the healing out. You're not alone.
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Post by katkraze on Jul 26, 2005 11:03:23 GMT -5
Hi there, I can totally relate! I am sooo obsessed with picking, I can easily do this for a full time job! At the time, I am convincing myselft that this will help my situation, and then become even more frustrated, when I obsess and pick a few days after, and pick the same areas, with the same outcome! Why ohhhh why, after 20yrs, will this ever end? And as a result, I find complete comfort in isolation!  Sincerely, frustrated w/ my skin - "AND ALL I WANT FOR X-MAS IS "NEW" SKIN |
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kimj
Junior Member
Posts: 55
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Post by kimj on Jul 27, 2005 2:12:40 GMT -5
Yeah I can relate to you guys also. There's been times when I wanted to go out sooo badly, but I stayed in because I felt like I looked so bad. I've been better about my face, but I have been picking my legs a lot lately, and I am so mad at myself for making myself miss out on summer things, like, wearing skirts, going swimming, etc. I'm trying really hard to stop so I can heal up enough to be able to get out there for some swimming before the end of summer.
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Post by jediknight on Jul 29, 2005 21:37:31 GMT -5
i feel everyones pain. i am missing out on life, hiding from everyone. literally losing my friends over this. i know my friends don't care how i look, i know that, but i just can't get past it myself. i can't not think about it. if i try to go somewhere, i can't enjoy it, my mind is constantly going on about how horrible i look and how people must be disgusted by me. glad to know we can understand eachother here.
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Post by dandelion on Aug 2, 2005 18:07:37 GMT -5
I have missed out on so much in life because of my picking. I hardly went out in highschool or university and now I have hardly any friends. When you keep making excuses why you can't go out, eventually people stop calling to ask. My face has improved somewhat now, but I have no friends to go out with. Im only 23, and have tons of energy, but I just sit at home with my parents. What a pathetic life I live.
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