new here been picking since 12

[smartstufflisa]

hi . I am so glad to finally know that there are other people out there with the same problem. I am 24 and have been picking my face since I was 12. I never thought I had bad skin until a boy I kissed said I made him breakout. Then I really looked in the mirror and its been downhill from there. I have been to numreous derm's but they all say I don't have an acne problem. I think I am going crazy. I can stare in the mirror and find millions of tiny blackheads. not the big ones.I just went on a pick fest last night, and now my face is a mess. My boyfriend of 5 years gets so mad at me when he see's what I've done to myself. He says I pick at stuff that is not even there. Not true, if I squeeze and gunk comes out then somethings there. I can spend literally 3 to 4 hours in the sink picking. I guess I go in spurts like I'll have one good session at least once a week, then I feel like I have got the pus out and the blackheads aren't as noticalbe. Then whenever i start feeling like they are filling up again then it starts all over. I mostly pick on my chin like not the middle but either side. The corners.

I am so ashamed of myself . I have scared myself for no reason other than I enjoy picking my face. they're not huge holes or anything , but just this last year I have noticed them. I hardley ever wear makeup , it just makes me feel like its filling in my pores and will make me break out. I clean my face every night. The sad thing is not to sound concieded or anything but I am a fairly hot chick. i think I would have never started all this mess if it was'nt for that boy. And now that I look back on it I think he said it just to be mean because I broke up with him. But the damage was done and its still there.

I am sorry I wrote so much if anyone reads this. it kinda theraputic in a way.

Thanks

[anonymousartist]

Hi and welcome to the boards.

Well, that boy was wrong and just being mean. I can't imagine how you could've made him break out unless he was allergic to something you were wearing and still that is just a very cruel thing to say to anyone.

It's perfectly ok not to wear make-up though if you do want to try it, there are many brands that claim to be non-codomogenic (I'm sure I spelled that wrong) which means they are not supposed to clog pores. I have also heard good recommendations for the Bare Esscentuals line, though I haven't tried it yet.

I suggest you read, (especially the part about how the skin works) the e-book at www.selfinjuriousskinpicking.com/ . It will give you a better understanding of why there's something in those pores and why it comes back (and will always come back) no matter how many times you squeeze it.

Of course, I know that's not all there is to picking. I have a go at blackheads myself sometimes, and you are not the only one to report that you pick at nothing. I hope you stick around the boards and keep posting. I know it has helped me. Oh, and you have no reason to be ashamed. You'll see here that there are a lot of normal people just like yourself who have this problem and I've also found that several of my friends do the same thing even if they don't consider it a problem.

[smartstufflisa]

Thanks for the support.

If I have to use makeup I do use the bare essentials, i would recommend it to anyone. It covers up really well. Especially if your face is still red from picking .